


This Night

by cordeliadelayne



Series: This Night [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Castiel Has Doubts, F/M, First Kiss, First Time, POV Ruby, Sex, wanting to feel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-26
Updated: 2016-09-26
Packaged: 2018-08-17 09:06:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8138390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cordeliadelayne/pseuds/cordeliadelayne
Summary: Castiel wants to know what it’s like to feel. Ruby shows him. Set after 410 – Heaven and Hell.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is aoibhe’s fault.
> 
> Originally posted to Livejournal in 2008.

“You’re hurt.”

Ruby rolled her eyes. “No shit, Sherlock.” She hobbled over to the sink in the dilapidated bathroom and winced as she pulled off her jacket. “Shouldn’t you be looking for Anna?” She looked into the mirror and saw his eyes in the reflection trailing the blood that dripped to the floor. “Unless you get off on watching a demon bleed?”

Castiel moved closer to her, far closer than she was comfortable with and she jumped as he put his hands on her lower back.

“What are you…?” But her sentence ended in a moan of pleasure as warmth spread throughout her, coursing up her spine and making every nerve-ending tingle. When he stepped away she felt strangely bereft.

“Your injuries are healed.”

“I could have done that for myself,” she said, turning around to face him.

Castiel almost smiled. “Yes. But not as well.”

Ruby watched him curiously. “So, why did you?” She was pretty certain that he would have killed her already if that were what he wanted but that didn’t mean she was going to relax her guard.

“You took a great risk. Allowing yourself to be tortured. You had no way of being sure that Alistair wouldn’t just kill you rather than negotiate.” Castiel paused. “It was quite a leap of faith.”

Ruby shrugged. “Girls gotta do, you know?” Although she could see quite plainly that he didn’t.

“I’ve never known a demon to work with humans before. Not like you.” He tilted his head. “You are most unusual.”

Ruby squirmed a little under his gaze. Angels still creeped her the hell out. Demons she could understand, humans too, but angels were just one level more above weird than she was happy with.

“Yeah well, that’s me. So, you done?” She tried to move past him, but he didn’t budge, forcing her to look up at him. His blue eyes seemed even brighter in the dingy room, barely lit by the light bulb that kept flickering above them. “What?”

“Hey, Ruby!” The shout and the knock on the door startled angel and demon both, though Castiel still did not move. “You okay in there?”

“I’m fine, Sam,” she replied. She stepped past Castiel a little, till she was standing next to him, her arm just brushing his. Suddenly his gaze seemed charged with something else, something that made her stomach drop.

“Dean and I are going to grab some supplies. Want to come?”

Castiel was still a statue, his gaze never leaving her face. She had no idea what it was he wanted her to say but something was happening here. And never let it be said that she didn’t take every opportunity that presented itself.

“No, it’s okay. I still need to get cleaned up. Just bring me back some fries.”

Sam laughed softly. “Sure. See you later”.

She listened to him and then Dean as they bickered on their way out and then heard the car driving away. The nearest town was a good thirty minute drive. Plenty of time.

“So,” Ruby said, quietly. “What’s going on?”

Castiel finally moved, inching forward like a cat asking to be stroked. “I don’t know.”

Ruby was pretty sure an uncertain angel was more terrifying than one that just wanted to smite you, but she tried to keep her expression clear. “Okay. You came here for a reason. It wasn’t just to check up on me.”

“You remember what it was like to be human. You can feel.”

“So, this is about Anna?” Ruby guessed. Then a cold feeling settled around her shoulders. “You’re not planning on falling are you?”

Castiel smiled then, a genuine smile that Ruby found herself returning before she knew what she was doing. “No. Just because we do not know our Father’s ultimate plan, that is no reason to doubt him. Anna was…” He paused and seemed to be looking deep inside himself for an answer. Ruby held her breath. “Anna spent much time amongst the humans. More than most. They are beautiful creatures. I can see why she would want to experience what they do, even if I do not _feel_ it. Not the way a human would.”

“But you do feel?” Ruby asked in a whisper. “Anna was wrong about that, wasn’t she?”

“Not all angels were created the same,” Castiel answered. “We each have a purpose. We each have free will, to a degree.”

“But you can’t disobey God’s direct word.”

“No. I…” he turned away from her then, lengthening the distance between them. “I would not want to.”

“But you don’t know whether you really don’t want to disobey, or whether God’s telling you not to, right? Catch-22.” She walked around him till she could face him. “But that still doesn’t explain what’s with the appearing in the bathroom act. Why talk to me about it?”

Castiel glanced down at her body and then back up at her face.

“Oh, fancy a piece of demon pie, now, do you?” She shook her head. “No chance.”

“You think I would taint myself with a demon’s touch?” Castiel asked, a flash of anger evident in his eyes.

Ruby scoffed. “I don’t think you have to worry about _me_ tainting _you.”_

A flutter of wings and Castiel was pushing her up against the bathroom door. Ruby gulped but tried not to show the angel how much she was enjoying herself. And then, just as their eyes met, Castiel let her go and vanished, and Ruby had to grab the door handle to stop herself from falling.

++++++

Later, when Ruby was full of hamburger and fries, not to mention a couple of beers, and Sam and Dean were asleep, she headed outside. It was a clear night and the stars seemed brighter than usual. She found a seat on a bench and then lay back on it, staring up at the sky, her hands lying on her stomach. She hadn’t told the Winchesters about Castiel’s earlier appearance; Dean was still pissed as hell at him and what would she have said anyway? That their guardian angel was having doubts? Big surprise there. At least as a demon she could still feel. She still knew what it was to love and grieve, be happy and despair. Angels were created, not born, and as far as she could see had one purpose, to do as they were told. And that wasn’t the way she wanted to live _her_ life.

It took her a moment to realise that she wasn’t alone, but when she tilted her head back she could see that Castiel was sitting next to her, head bowed as if in prayer.

“I’m sorry about earlier. I should not have done that.”

“I thought you couldn’t feel sorry?” Ruby replied, but her expression softened when she saw Castiel’s flinch.

“Anna was angry at me. She was trying to distract me from my purpose.”

Ruby shrugged. She supposed she’d just have to take his word for that. “So, what’s going on?” She sat up and pulled her long hair behind her. Castiel reached up and moved a loose strand from her forehead.

“I’m not supposed to want to feel.”

“But you do, don’t you?” Ruby watched him closely. Then she slipped off her jacket and stood up. Castiel watched her cautiously, but she had her prey in sight and she wasn’t about to let it get away again. “Shh,” she whispered, placing a finger on his mouth. “There’s nothing wrong with wanting to feel.”

“There is for me,” he said softly against her finger.

Ruby smiled seductively and straddled him, her smile widening as his hands automatically rested on her hips. She scooted forward until her forehead was resting against his. “How do you know, unless you try?”

Castiel opened his mouth to answer but Ruby kissed him instead, her hand moving to stroke his cheek as she deepened the kiss. And then the floodgates opened, as Castiel returned it with a ferocity that near took her breath away. She moaned as he pulled her closer and then as he lifted her up slightly, his hands roaming under her T-shirt, his vessels callused hands rubbing against her smooth skin. Never had she been more grateful that she’d ended up in this body.

“This doesn’t feel so bad, does it?” Ruby whispered, pulling off her top and bra. She gasped as Castiel’s hands cupped her breasts and then as he sucked at her nipple. She’d say this for angels, they were fast learners. “Yes, just like that,” she gasped. She put her hands on the back of his head and kept him in place, her head falling back so she was looking up at the stars. She wondered if any of the angels were looking down at them right now, and a shiver of desire shot through her.

She gently pulled Castiel’s head back and kissed him again, before reaching between them and pulling at the belt on his trousers.

“Let me,” Castiel groaned and began to undo his own trousers, slipping them to the floor. Ruby immediately got up and took off her jeans and underwear until she was standing completely naked before the angel. “You are all so beautiful,” Castiel whispered.

Ruby hid her blush by straddling him once more and reaching towards his half hard cock. “Normally we’d have…” she stopped when Castiel handed her a small tub of lube. “Where did you? Never mind,” she shook her head in bemusement but began to coat his erection with the lube. At least this showed some sort of forethought on his part.

“That’s…enough…” Castiel panted. Ruby leaned down and kissed his moans away.

“We haven’t even got to the good stuff, yet.”

She lifted herself up and sank down onto his erection. Castiel bucked up in surprise at the feeling of her surrounding his aching cock, his arms coming around Ruby’s waist to pull her close, her breasts rubbing against his shirt. Ruby wasted little time in pulling off his tie and pulling at his shirt until they were skin to skin.

“This is what you all feel?” Castiel murmured, seeming to forget that Ruby was a demon and not a human. And who was she to correct him?

“It can be,” she sighed into his ear. “Please, move, Cas, fuck me…” She started to move herself, then, using her grip on his shoulders to lift herself up and then down again. He quickly got with the programme, chasing after the same sensations she was, until his grip on her waist was almost painful as he crushed her to him.

“I had no idea it would feel so…” Castiel murmured, before nibbling at her neck and ear and seeming pleased at Ruby’s response.

“Oh, yes, that’s just what I want,” Ruby moaned, her breathing becoming shallow. She could feel her orgasm building and though her normal reaction would be to let her eyes slide shut and to wallow in the sensations, this time she wanted to see her partner’s face. She wanted to look into an angel’s eyes when he came apart.

“Is that…is this…” Castiel tried to ask, his face warring between confusion and desire.

“Yes,” Ruby murmured, pulling back so she could see him clearly. “This is what it feels like to be human.”

And then his movements became erratic and Ruby clenched her legs around him and groaned as she felt him coming inside of her. His eyes wide in surprise he kept on bucking into her, his mouth open in a silent cry until Ruby couldn’t help herself but had to kiss him, had to feel him as well as watch him, her own orgasm rippling through her as she gripped him tightly to her.

“Yes,” she groaned as he kept on moving inside of her and as her orgasm skirted from pleasure until almost pain. It was just like when he’d healed her, his touch enflaming every inch of her, reaching parts of her that no one else had ever come close to until she could only close her eyes and fall against him, completely spent.

They stayed like for what seemed an age, Ruby resting her head upon Castiel’s shoulder as he gently rubbed her back. It was only now, with the cold breeze cooling her skin, that she actually started to feel a little guilty. Castiel didn’t seem like the other angels, and she wasn’t sure she wanted him to be punished because of her.

As if reading her thoughts Castiel pushed her gently away from him. “I should go now.”

“Are you…are you going to get into much trouble for this?” She watched his reaction closely but he’d gone back to using his unreadable expression that awed and terrified her in equal measure.

“Part of my job is to observe humanity,” he replied after a moment of looking into the distance. “There is something to be said for doing so at first hand.”

Ruby’s laugh caught them both off guard. “Was that…a joke?”

Castiel shrugged. “I’d be in more trouble if you were human. And if you were not willing.” A definite frown appeared on his face. “My brothers have inflicted far graver transgressions against humans than this, in the time before.”

“I better go too. Before I’m missed.” She eased herself off of Castiel and began gathering up her clothes. She turned back to him to find he was already dressed and looking completely unruffled. “Neat trick.”

Castiel inclined his head in response and between one blink and the next he was gone.

Ruby smiled pleasantly to herself as she got dressed. If he really wasn’t going to get in trouble then that meant he’d be back. And there was a vast number of things about humanity that she was sure they’d both enjoy discovering.


End file.
